Your girlfriend is a south jersey whore
it was a shit show
We all have our days. But yours might be on the internet.
Define "chronic" masturbator.
Some girl just asked us for directions back to campus. we told her to take the first four lefts. We live on a block. she believed us
She was so happy she found her sunglasses, that she blew me. Im now randomly hiding things of hers in hopes she'll find them and I'll get a repeat performance.
you just kept saying 'take out my tanks' and tell the cab driver to go slower, i have no idea what you were talking about but i'm glad you had fun.
I have meat and whiskey. will you bring condoms?
she wanted me to tie her up with my playstation charger cord. i kept on hoping she wasn't a squirter. those cords r expensive. could have def been a Sony commercial tho
I will gladly accept you into my home with open legs.
I could fuck to npr.
I would ride that face into the sunset
He and I tag each other in memes all day. You could say it's getting pretty serious.
its times like this i wish i didnt have a penis
Is it too much to ask for 10 minutes of privacy while I masturbate?
He's such a jerk. If only his penis was attached to someone else
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