I want to give you a handjob with my mouth.
I cockslap morals
he fucked me so hard my future children felt it
So I cleaned the toilet last night at 2 am and woke up with pink eye. Never doing that again.
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my host sister just stared at me as i knocked over the lamp, then took out all my chocolate, walked into the bathroom, and locked the door. i'm officially the worst exchange student ever.
All she said to me last night is that when her eyes roll back, to release my choke hold.
Next time he asks to wax your nipple while you're passed out I promise I'll be sober enough to intervene.
Quick question, when did I develop feelings, and how can I make them go away?
That's two questions.
This question may sound intrusive, but how did pushing out a baby affect your vagina?
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doctors was a success... no liver damage and I lost five pounds.. we're celebrating tonight you get the whiskey I'll get the burritos.
The thought "Ummm which pants am I wearing? ...I *am* wearing pants, right?" just ran through my head. I'm done. So done.
It's a lube slip n slide down the hallway now. Details later.
You're about wine.
Yes, I'm like 90% wine at the moment
Why are we so great
Like I'm def going to a therapist but I wouldn't change a thing about us except maybe the peeing
Of course he's seen my tits, I wave those things around like a trump supporter does an American flag