I will be home in 10 min. Dont be beating off on the couch
enter at your own risk
Last night I ate the rest of the salsa with my hands. And i DONT have a hangover? Glorious.
shes a 6ft ginger. she brings nothing to the table except for awkwardness
its a nice change of pace not blacking out and actually remembering getting laid
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I have my ice chest next to my bed. Instead of breakfast in bed, its beers in bed. 10x better
rolling absolute tits, turn on the red lights for when i get home.
He was bigger soft than my ex was hard. A gold medal rebound.
I had sex with marker all over my face so I can do just about anything.
I am a figure skater. You should know better than to let me get drunk near any patches of ice during Olympics season.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
MY GOD DAMN TV STOPS WORKING EVERY TIME I AM THIS FUCKING HIGH. WHY MUST IT TORMENT ME?!
Playing pong against a girl who fucked my ex boyfriend so that's how my nights going
I didn't want dick. I wanted spaghetti.
Did you wake up next to Karina?
So that's her name
Just once, can I please come back to a room that doesn't smell like beer and cum?
Just when I thought we may have our first low-key night together, I sang an Aladdin karaoke song to a bunch of roller derby girls, you took shots with married women, and we both fell asleep in our offices.
Randomize