TIT CHECK! TIT CHECK! ALERT! ALERT!!!!
You American Chicks are so confusing....1 day you are on my nuts next day you be trippin
Dude its not just American chicks...a small penis is the same in every language
alright so where did all these fingerpaintings on my bedroom wall come from?
dude. you drew those with your dick
You just kept yelling, "THAT'S THE POWER OF PINESOL, BABY!"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I have a huge bruise on my thigh that I am 95% sure is due to you repeatedly throwing me over couches.
Also I think I'm starting to get calluses on my hands from my level of sexual activity
Gosh, I don't even have that. Let alone someone to tie me up and whip me with Twizzlers.
youre always welcome to strip dance on tables with me Mag. what are friends for.
At least I will not still be rolling when I pick up this animal. Thats a good development in five years
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My neighbor is burning all of her ex's things in a metal drum outside the window. Guess who's going to make a new friend?
She wouldn't fuck me because I had a cast, so I took her friend home
Googled 'how drunk am I' and it was NOT helpful
I found Erin. She's getting a back massage from the coat check boy and drinking all his whiskey.
I told you naked hot tub wrestling would turn bad now one of us has a gash on the head and another a black eye
It’s the biggest dick I’ve ever seen. His IQ drops 25 points when he’s hard because there’s no blood going to his brain
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