There is a such thing as a wonderpuss octopus. Officially my new favorite animal.
nah, shes just mad because we went through all her fb pics and tagged her crotch as all the guys shes fucked
He couldn't stand on his own, but he managed to somehow to get to the beer garden and get served 3 more. I'm proud to call him my cousin.
You obviously dont comprehend the level of insane i operate at
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I want to apologize but I don't know how. Do I just say "sorry for OD'ing on your couch"? I think that just sounds weird.
My new dealer is 16. I have been getting high longer than he has been alive.
I don't see the problem
Neither of us have work tomorrow and we live w/n walking distance. This is your official Sandy booty call. Come rock me like a hurricane.
We ended up at an Asian frat. I made out with two Mexicans at the same time and I pulled a muscle in my leg from twerking too low. Diversity.
well some coke just fell out of my nose in my partners meeting so i'd say my day's off to a fantastic start
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just broke my no shot rule again.. Made out with a stranger. That's 0 for 3 this month for the record
You know the party's good when you say "Never have I ever caused an emergency landing" and someone drinks
They pay me enough to pretend to be either helpful, or heterosexual. If they want both I need one hell of a raise.
Does your drug dealer have a printer I can use??
I think its a little fucked up she invited you to her wedding, are you going?
There is a lot of acid in my drugs right now
....ill put you down as a no then
Oh the sweet dreamless sleep of drugs
You? On what? Why?
Randomize