ad ew i am wasted whats my problem
You picked the wrong day to call in sick. She's wearing the librarian glasses today.
Just got the orientation leader spot. For the first two days, I will be one of the best looking guys on campus. The freshman girls will be so disappointed they settled for me when everyone else comes back.
When black out puking doesn't involve crying and promises to never get drunk again... to just a subtle, 'excuse me while I go vomit in the bathroom of this bar'.. you know you've finally grown up.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
the amount of times i have wished for a boxed wine emoticon is almost alarming. almosttt
I don't think I'm emotionally ready for this blow job.
Overdraft my account again. Parents are starting to ask questions. What would go over better a gambling or drug addiction??
I don't judge her for getting booty calls at 2 in the morning, so she can't judge me for staying in friday nights and putting spray cheese on pringles.
My time here is complete. I think I have now thrown up in every major degree programs building
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Now go get drunk with your fam and get back into ur christmas groove. No time for gonnorhea
who says I'm not relevant to the kids today? Just had snapchat sex, blows the roof off aim cyber sex
you made it your goal to puke in every planter around the union. you got most of them. im proud of you
I woke up, topless, my car was parked funny so I threw on my hoodieto go fix it and found a jello shot in my pocket. where did I go last night?!
It's OK, I woke up in a drag queen's bed last weekend. It took me forever to get the glitter out of my cleavage.
i could have got laid, but instead, i threw up in her hair. you can cross that off the bucket list.
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