I just remembered Dan asking me all polite in the middle of sex "do you mind if I get behind you?" that was the most polite way I've been asked to do it doggy style
is it bad that i regret hanging out with a girl tonight because that means i have less time to sit on youtube watching xmen cartoons?
So, i took all the condoms from his nightstand, not in the crazy ex way, but in the I paid for them way.
yep. it's official. for $40 they will let you lick the stripper pole.
Your lack of great college experience of margaritas and foam parties scares me
Cavemen vs astronauts. weapons to be determined. Who would win?
Either I'm deep cleaning my apartment out of severe academic procrastination or I'm subconsciously nesting and need to take a pregnancy test.
I'm just gonna wear a long dress with no panties today. My pussy needs a break.
I took a hang over nap infront of the door to my 9am class
It's meant to be, Cynthia. You, him, and your developed breasts are meant for each other.
Yay! Also. When you're coming down eat waffles and touch yourself. You won't regret it.
I woke up to half of the whiskey bottle gone, and apparently I showered in my clothes. Pretty good start to SB2015 I'd say?
I forgot to tell you that he serenaded me with "Fuck Her Gently" by Tenacious D. And I didn't hate it.
So I justmade it back home and was greeted to a squirrel in my dorm... Last time I let my friends rent it out for a party.
I have vodka, fruit gushers, and health insurance. Let's party.
Randomize
