so we'll all just be running around naked, basically. and high.
I wish I could have two rating systems on iTunes. "This one is a 5 star. This one is only a 5 star when I'm baked."
I'm like cupid
You're a whore with a bow and arrow
what's an appropriate "I'm fucking your grandson but I'm trying to hide it" outfit?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm being fed tequila grapes by a girl on stilts...
We haven't said piping hot jizz in awhile... that needs to come back into our conversations
Screw them and thier engaged asses. I've got liquor to drink and boys I don't know to make out with.
Opened my purse to realize I have someone else's birth certificate. What happens to me in college?
Only in my life does a conversation about Hanukkah lead to sexting
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Why did I puke in my shower caddy last night
She just mixed her Emergen-C with champagne... Vegas here we come!
Like, I want sex but I also would be okay with Netflix
She's astronaut crazy. She will wear Depends and drive 12 hrs non-stop if you swipe right.
Challenge accepted
She's just a lonely cunt and i hope she stays that way for the rest of her fucking life.
This seems like an over reaction to someone eating your fries.
My mom found me this morning passed out, face down on my dinning room floor
That must have been one awkward situation haha
Well I woke up in my bed.... I don't remember her finding me
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