I want to touch your soul through your body...with my penis...
Mike i'm at church right now...
I'm smoking weed out of a trumpet
I just did a slip and slide down the hall way of my apartment building
Tie
It's like Facebook knows when I'm about to masturbate and tells me to reconnect with exes.
He DELETED brick breaker off his blackberry why even bother trying to find something in common?
It's a good thing i didn't end up pregnant...i would have had to figure out his last name.
It was literally like being eaten out by a dog. That bad.
But you wanna know what the sadest part is? I had to smoke on the way back home cause my mom would be suspicious if I wasn't high after I was supposedly hanging out with you.
Beer lympzucs are ki7lling me
The yard is growling at me WHAT DID U GIVE ME?
It sounded like he said "don't stop" but all I could hear were his balls.
Another beautiful Sunday, another beautiful day the stick is not positive. Amen.
I shit like a lady though so that rarely happens
why the hell did we go to a rave last night?
we didn't?
definitely went to a bar with strobe lights
JENNIFER. You passed out in a toilet with a color changing light in it.
Also. Picked being late to work over the maid finding my vibrator. Life choices....
It took like and hour to get him in me and then he came in like 2min. Size aint everything
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