The funny thing about my wife cheating on me is that the guy probably has genital warts now. Sweet.
what's the vibe there?
extraordinary amounts of gine
normally I beat off every night before I go to bed even though my little brother sleeps in the same room. So I was starting to last night, and he jumped out of bed and said "Fuck, Im not listening to this shit again" We havent talked since. fuck me
he was fingering the outside of my pants..i knew that was my cue to leave
Going to get tested monday. You're coming with. Bonding time, slut style.
I think I've lost the thrill of being a slut. It's just that the newness has worn off, I think.
So I cleaned out my gym bag. Found half a bottle of malibu.
You know, I could pretend I'm shocked but what's the use?
It wasn't a threesome, it was me making out with one while looking at the other one screaming "does this make you jealous?"
If you have a glass table... Put it up. I don't wanna hurt myself again, I just got my stitches out...
the manly guy you want to date so badly? he's at the club. as a drag queen. wearing higher heels than you own. think about that.
I guess your brother-in-law will have his day in the sun tonight after you leave. By that, I of course, mean he's gonna suck liquor milk out your sister's tits.
some how during sex we caught an ENTIRE pillow on fire. A WHOLE PILLOW.
Oh I see how it is...you can snap chat the world your balls but I wear dinosaur feetie pajamas and I'm the "weird one"
Someone left a middle school yearbook here. I recognized one kid from banging his mom last year.
I'm getting reacquainted with drunk me. She has grown up a lot.
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