Being alone has allowed me to flourish into a complete weirdo
So it's 10:55am and I just woke up on the floor in the hallway on the4th floor. There should probably be no moredrinking competetions.
It all came flooding back to me: there was a woman with one hand
We agreed on being friends w/ benefits. Lets see if that really happens.
Ok, so that was not supposed to go to u, my bad. I feel horrible.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i should start naming my morning wood
great idea but wrong number
Some girl just asked us for directions back to campus. we told her to take the first four lefts. We live on a block. she believed us
he said it was like fucking a big sack of slut potatoes
Yes, that's a picture of my balls. It isn't however an answer to my question.
yeah, but the first step is admitting you have a problem, the next step is kidnapping him
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
just saw someone climb out of the dumpster at cvs and start walking down the street like it was completely normal
Oh my god did you actually lose a tooth
Btw, if I didn't have 3 limbs in restraints and my free hand offing myself with the pocket rocket, I would have snap chatted you. Next time.
I just spilled a shot of Patron on your mom.. Body shots may be happening. You better get here quick.
He stopped in the middle of us banging in order to check in for his Southwest flight.
He held my hair while I gave him a blow job. Now that's teamwork.
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