I just spent the last hour reading customer reviews on amazon.com for the book "it hurts when I poop." Send help.
I just threw up a christmastime peep. I am literally already sick of the holidays.
They had miseltoe over the keg.... thats cheating
Forgot to mention there might be a picture of me being thrown in the air while at a Mexican restaurant
Also, the zoloft kicked in and I can't get an erection anymore. So I'm depressed.
haha she has always seemed a little off. when i met her i was told she was the queen slut. and she had a crown on at the time. it seemed appropriate.
should i go to class, or party with a mariachi band?
meriachi band is very tempting, do they have dos equis?
There was an unopened condom by my car when I went to pick it up this morning. Someone may have fucked on the hood of my car last night. Don't think it was me but I can't rule it out 100%.
I asked if I could borrow some condoms. She referred to herself as "a soup kitchen for whores".
Our motto for the night: BLACK OUT OR BACK OUT.
That's our motto every night.
I just got a girl to make out with me just by saying "get at me." Get at me
he's been dating her for 18 months and cheating on her with me for 16. if that's not commitment, i don't know what is.
Not sure if I should ask if I can have my underwear back or just avoid that all together.
Your the only girl I know that carries a $1100 purse with tater tots inside
I know I drink too much cuz "ssssjllapph peneinssesss" automatically comes up in my phone now.
Randomize
