Just saw a girl in a wheelchair puke then rally. Diversity matters.
But life is now good. Well, not good, good would be not wearing the penis hat with the extended family of the boy I just cheated on, but as good as it's going to get today
I'm going to be fiscally responsible and buy a handle.
Excuse me, but I got friendzoned and all I could think about was the fact that I didn't have my underwear back on yet.
Red flag bro. Her only friends are barflys and a teen with a fake ID
When nipples stop being hilarious I'll stop getting them out in public.
I got poked in the eye with a penis last night. How's your day?
Peeing in taco bell cups is part of the fun of going to taco bell
Puke-y regrets or just things-seem-far-away regrets?
all I remember the next morning was crawling through the doggy door and finding my underwear in my purse
I know its 2 in the morning and everything. But i just straight up yelled "DON'T YOU UNDERSTAND THIS WORLD IS DIFFICULT ENOUGH AS IT IS WITHOUT YOU PULLING THIS BULLSHIT ON ME" to my taco. Because it fell apart on me. I think i might be cracking under this finals pressure.
I actually talked to his parents last night about it. haha. I had a bottle of smirnoff in my hand, I'm sure they took me serious.
Sorry I missed your call earlier. I was getting high with my high school band teacher.
It feels like heartburn in my lungs. I'll buy 2 pounds.
This Cougar is looking at me like I’m a piece of meat and buying me top shelf cocktails
I’m getting a fear boner thinking about what she might do to me
Randomize
