her vagina looked like a handful of raisins.
walked right past julianne moore (on her walk of shame this morning) god i love new york. :)
It's an acquired taste. Like keystone. Or caviar.
wait one more day. tuesday is my official "i hit on you and/or we hooked up this weekend" friend request day.
There are paw prints all over my ceiling.
What was the name of the cook I had sex with at Famous Dave's?
What shirt can I wear out that says 'I may have a broken arm, but it's not the one I give handjobs with'?
Stolen hampster on my tits. Don't tell me I don't know how to party.
im currently assessing the tequila situation in preparation of your arrival
He slapped my ass and his clap-on light turned on.
It was literally 8 o'clock in the morning. His horniness knows no bounds.
party tonight. bring as many traffic cones as you can find. we need to section off the blackout drunks way better this time
at any given day I am at least 60% invested in my work. today I am staggered around 3.5%
I'm sorry for what I said when I was orgasming
I will warn you that there is a pic of me riding a buffalo....and for the record, I was completely sober!!
Randomize
