if i die, you can have my worn out liver and american apparel deep v's.sell the liver to a chinese restaurant
Besides, I'm not in my 30's. I'm still allowed to drink wine from a bag.
If I knew losing weight would mean this many fucking creepers I would've just stayed fat.
he was definitely TRYING to give me herpes.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
if you had such a terrible roommate you would understand. jacking off in his conditioner is just the start.
just won 200$ from the school for "liking" the anti-alcohol seminar. putting it to good use
how?
not even kidding, my fake id is arriving in 6-8 business days
ERIN AND I ARE GETTING MATCHING VIBRATORS. I'M PEER PRESSURING YOU INTO JOINING THE CLUB. Besides we're the three best friends that anyone could have, you better not ruin that by being a pussy and not treating your pussy to awesomeness. That is all.
I found out Naomi Campbell and I have the same birthday and I feel like that explains so much
all I've ever wanted was a guy with twelve cats who will tie me up in bed
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He came over apologized for his lack of sexual skills. Cleaned my kitchen cooked me dinner. And gave me another one minute stand. I think im okay with this
I'm literally beginning to think that my sex dreams are prophesies
And remember people can't hear you kick ass in space
There's a possibility I may have hooked up with that British guy...
Possibility? You left the door open! Everyone saw!
Honestly cannot tell if I’m magical or really, really high.
4 of us. Guys and girls. Were sitting there discussing the passed out half naked Brit girl on the floor. She is no longer the international woman of mystery.
Randomize