Goodnight my chunky, little, marshmallow muncher
bitch please you did NOT just unlike my status..
If you're missing hair this morning, i'm sorry in advance
What a good family we'd make, him and I and our kids and his good dick.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Would you like me to write a persuasive essay on how you should let me suck your dick?
i'm having taco bell mild sauce and tums for breakfast because i'm hungover and thats all i can find. it's like thanksgiving up in here
She gave such good road head it was turned into side-of-the-road head for everyone's safety
Oh my god. He likes it up the butt. But loves womanly support. Omg. Its bad. Its bad. Ive had too much whiskey for this to be ANYthing except bad.
He invited me over for shower sex and pizza. Officially the best booty call relationship around.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
In other news, Justin Bieber has a big dick and that makes me uncomfortable.
Also, there's definitely not a non-hilarious way to ask to stick something up your butt.
If you don't come home and fuck me soon I'm walking over there naked and dragging you home by your penis
he told me he liked me . I thought we were just fuck buddies . This ruins everything!
I just timed my pee with a stop watch. From when the main stream started to ended. It was 45.1 seconds. This is the truth trust me.
he had a cock ring. i orgasmed before he even put it in
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