...., I just tried brushing my hair wothh a toothbrushg. fail
ps not my toothbrush awkward.
Scream out, "Tax-Free dick over here" in the bar. Ladies love tax free stuff
GUESS WHAT I JUST LICKED
I feel like half our conversations start this way.
He literally had no idea who I was, so he made me turn around 360 degrees and when he saw my ass, he blurted out my first AND last name.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
just witnessed some guy trade his friend $5 and a condom for his keys.
I don't care how old I am, if it's your 21st birthday I'm going to make out with you.
Seriously. There are at least 10 other people drinking at the bar with me at 10:40. Im justifying it with the fact that I've been up since 5am.
He left a trail of vomit straight from our dorm to the bathroom. Looks like we have our identities for the rest of the year.
Where are you?! I require drunk, males and possibly crying. Vomiting is optional and/or optimal as is karaoke.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He balanced a treat on his nose, and then he rolled me a joint. My bf is the best pet ever.
I woke up without my clothes on covered up with a towel on the floor because for some reason I took a bath in my clothes at 2am.
Taking care of drunk people fulfills my need to be a mother
If my dick was big enough to fuck the eye of a hurricane, I would.
Hey before you quit, let me sell drugs to your boss at least one more time
Me and some guy are crying in a port a potty together after another guy broke up with both of us.
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