i think ur clone was at the club last week. she slapped some tall girl in the face who tried to steal her spot on the podium. i dont know if ur like her, but she seemd like a ninja badass with superpowers
Was it cool?
About as cool as only getting a handjob on your honeymoon.
You just kept yelling at the cabby "I own this cab" and insisted on smoking with all the windows up
if I could send you my dick right now I would. that's how good of a friend I am.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
WHY AM I ALWAYS THE GAY FRIEND?!?!
Can we have a celebratory fuck now that the lockout is over?
You're the best girlfriend ever.
Sounds good. I will just get tanked here and wear this batman mask.
I'm ordering a French maid costume for my dog too. It's like a couples costume, except for losers with dogs.
she broke up with me the week she got divorced. maybe I should grab a beer with her ex
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It started out as friends with benefits and now I'm picking up her kids from daycare...what has happened to me
Why are there so many fucking Lambchop puppets hidden around my house?!
Hey, I'm just seeing how you're doing and letting you know I fucked your dad last night. Don't fuck with me.
Do you think telling guys I'm majoring in magic is a good pickup line?
On a scale of having tea with Ghandi to the apocalypse how bad of an idea is it to drink with a 100 degree fever?
I’m not sure she knows my name. She introduced me as “the fuck toy”
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