what happened last night??
everyone saw ******'s vagina
and that's just the beginning
I'm reading about reasons for wearing clothing. IS THIS COLLEGE OR PRESCHOOL?
its not facebook stalking, its market reasearch
I just threw up in a patch of wild flowers on the side of the road. I never knew rock bottom was so beautiful.
I'm pregaming before our pregaming dinner...with peanut butter and beer. I think I need to re-evaluate my budget...
Just the budget?
When did you hit me on the head with a stool?
my mom just left...time to break out that water bottle of wine that I sewed into my teddy bear
WHY DIDN'T YOU INVITE ME TO RUN THROUGH TACO BELL'S SPRINKLERS AT 4AM?!
I'm sorry I peed on your everything.
We call it "Dishes: Hard Mode". Basically whoever is doing dishes gets head but needs to finish the dishes before they cum.
And so far nothing been broken!
I get a nose bleed and my uncle is automatically giving me the "your doing lines off dashboards again aren't you" look
I still can't get over the fact that he thinks I have my life together... That has to be one of the nicest yet most sadly misled things anyone has ever said about me
Our sibling relationship has really blossomed into a wonderful mutual acceptance of sluttyness
we talked about the guy being eaten by the anaconda.. Then I proceeded to blow him
Everytime I give him head I make him rub my back. Teamwork at it's finest.
Randomize
