So he flipped me over and suddenly went limp then told me he was thinking about his ex.
so you punched his junk, right?
A homeless man in dtwn SF was blasting lil wayne and singing at the top of his lungs. I kinda wanted to give him my life savings
No one goes out in public like that, unless they do anal
he burped in my vagina and tried to deny it...
Our date was amazing and I would like to reward you with a blow job under your desk.
I can pencil you in at 3:30
He was having Sex and you yelled 'hot and dangerous!" and he responded with "if you're one of us then roll with us!" when he went to he bathroom I saw her getting dressed, looking mortified.
Somehow he made it really romantic
He came on your tits... That doesn't scream romance to me.
I think sneezing out coked up boogers onto your professor disqualifies you from the "I was sick" excuse
Lol what? Monday night impromptu acid drop was the alternative.
My Midnight Kiss was a Big Mac.. Happy New Year
I responded like every reasonable adult would. With a gif
I may not have my dignity, pride or sanity but I have my pants.
That girl is like a master class on how to be an unlovable crazy person.
I'm going to target high, just in case I ask you where my paycheck went later
we found her. shes in the bathtub full of raw pasta. i dont even know...
Randomize
