but what if he tries to talk dirty to me with the lisp?
you guys are cousins why the FUCK are your pants off
unrelatedly i think im gonna download boogie nights just to see mark wahlberg's penis
I'm so ready for finals. She finally agreed to skypesex me from spain so now i'm up until 4am studying every morning waiting for her to get online
This is the prime rib incident all over again
To say he's a good fuck is like saying the beatles had a bit of success. My vag is still mourning the fact he moved.
You know, last years football game was epic, but seeing the same girl that gave you a bj in the parking lot, in the same parking spot...that's fate.
So i realized that if i bought everything from my google search history for the past week i would have a dolphin, a wolf costume, a unicorn costume, a katana and a bullet proof vest. Not sure how the dolphin would fit in but the rest of it would end up in one awesome night or someone would die. Either way i say we do it.
im sober
you just pulled your sweatpants out of your bag and thanked them for being alive
Even dream me is a champ at smoking weed
Yep. My memoirs will be called "A Slore Worth Mentioning"
I think I blacked out after I decided drinking alone on the trailered jetskis was a good idea
Masturbating to the DNC live stream. Not my proudest moment
Don't drag this out. All I need to know is if I have to put pants on or not.
IT WAS A FUCKING ELEPHANT I SWESR!!!!!
Nathan, I haven't spoken to you in 12 years and it's 6am. Kindly fuck off.
Randomize
