Whatever, she only has 293 friends, she cant afford to be defriending me..
I went to class with the sex aroma on me. The hot sun doesn't help much.
She wants an explanation of my cousins creepy foot fetish with my god sister. i don't know how I can sum this up in a text.
When I told her that her boyfriend was making out with another chick, all she said was "which one"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
as you might have guessed from my lack of texts, the herpes have calmed down.
I rigged together two of my vibrators for more power... I've created a monster.
you stole two subs and a drink from jimmy johns and walked out yelling "get at me bitches"
The bar would not accept my money. I have reached God status here
I deflowered you on valentines day. I AM THE BEST AT ROMANCE. LOVE ME.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I totally just pulled my thong out of my purse at the grocery store. Oops.
You kept ripping all your clothes off and saying, "Let me be free!"
I AM SO HORNY, I AM GOING TO DIE. I NEED SOMEONE TO WISH MY VAGINA A MERRY CHRISTMAS.
And since we used to fuck you are absolutely obligated to like my tweets
Dear Ex-Sister-in-Law, I never thought I would say this, but I just found your panties in my back seat. Please remind me to give them back.
The cat just brought me a bottle opener. I think she's my soulmate.
I'd ask how but then you'd tell me.
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