He looks like a mix between a retired piano teacher and a cat that just swallowed a sock.
I hope i woe up in your car, or else i stole someone elses and slept in the back seat
your idea of a balenced meal is a microwave frozen burrito, a cup of ramen noodles, and a can of budlight. honestly tell me how your resolution is to lose weight,
should my break up email to my English professor be in MLA format?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
oh god was she eating orange peels again
we already have meals planned for the weekend.
SEMEN IS NOT A MEAL.
I'm crossing my legs while pooping. Taking a shit has never looked so proper.
I still have his teeth marks on the base of my penis. You didnt miss much
I think my sunburn makes my ass look bigger
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
For context, I was hiding under the pong table mooing at everyone by that point.
No but I was fuckin done when I realized my acrylic nail caught fire when I was hitting the bong.
Serious question: does drunken cyber sex with a stranger on omegle count as cheating???
Sara can't come to the phone right now. She's currently having an in-depth conversation with a flower pot.
To be fair, this is a tequila-while-rewatching-Benedict-Cumberbatch-as-Van-Gogh idea, so I don't know if it will hold up tomorrow.
I did not shave my legs to sit at home and diddle myself. He better wake the fuck up and put the fear of god in me!
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