We're pre-gaming then going to chuck e cheese's.
If you're joking I'm going to be sad
It just feels so wrong throwing away the condoms into her Hello Kitty trashcan
I think I just met the technical qualifications for binge drinking in five minutes
Well i have to fuck at least one of your roommates this year to keep the tradition alive.
Can I have my ID back now or are you using it to crossdress again?
I poured myself a glass of chocolate chips at some point during the evening.
Its really bad when you fall asleep at a stop light outside the hotel and you wake up to a small spanish limo driver knocking on your window to tell you it's a green light
I feel that it is my duty to the human race to invent a colon squeegy
I feel like im becoming the girl who only drunk texts him. I would be in the dog house, if situations like this had dog houses.
You got a write up and a first aid award all in the same night. The don was impressed!
I mean, he drove your car and it burst into flames, if anyone cant be trusted, it's him.
I have the rest of my life to settle down this is totally time for friends and pizza
I had to take on your role as drunk idiot....I have no idea how you do it so well and so regularly. That shit is exhausting.
Remeber when we went camping and fucked those two guys? Yeah me either but I'm covered in poison oak so I'm guessing it's from that.
I'm not gonna be naked if your not here. Thats like a waste of nakedness
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