I've been thinking about all the girls in my life in terms of applying to college.
Huh?
I guess what im trying to say is that your my safety school.
I wish my dick could take responsibilities for his own actions
Put your dick on his face to wake him up, dont worry its fine.
it took me 2 minutes to realize that it wasn't HER hand on my penis. First, and worst threesome ever..
i've met an abundance of virgins and guys who where flip flops, i thinks there's a correlation
I think he finally resigned to the fact he could not get off. He just looked at me and said "I'm having testicle difficulties," rolled over and passed out.
I need to stop drinking. Side note- we have a party bus tonight. So the drinking will have to end after that
Blood. All over. Pre coke adventure needs to slow down unless I'm involved
Listen to my proposal.... I feed you crackers while I fuck you ever so gently.
You started an entire relationship based only on sex and emoticons.
I told him to keep his feelings in his pants because they're annoying and to just fuck me.
It's been a year of occasional hook ups....this was bound to happen sometime even with your jank ovary schedule.
You just wrote a check for drugs...pretty sure you don't have cash for beer..
You faceplanted on the railroad tracks and when I tried to tell you to get up, you told me you were "taking a quick breather"
Gameplan: If the cops show up, find a potted plant to hide behind... It's worked before!
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