i'm watching degrassi (go figure) and the episode is about jimmy not being able to get a boner and now he's famous and rapping about popping pussies..i dont get it.
I considered driving home in his mom's bathrobe until i realized i'd have to stop to buy cigarettes
I saved him in my fone as special pumba. he was just pumba but then he found me drugs
Just did a line with a monopoly bill. Tell me I'm not fancy.
It had been so long since my last time that it was easily a double helping of stomach pancakes. I think she was mildly impressed.
He's a navy seal. He can stick it anywhere he wants.
Just curious... Do you still have the cocks bracelet? You know, the one we pass around to whoevers been the biggest slut recently?
there are ass prints on the hood of my car.
you invented a new sport called "bacon pulling" and you cried everytime a piece broke
Some random at the bar just whispered in my ear that he wants to eat me out while on bath salts....
I was stalking his twitter and saw that he used punctuation in a hashtag. Thank god we didn't work out because I can't be with someone that incompetent
Jager makes that raccoon appear... The one that shits in a basket in my living room.
So I woke up really sad and then I looked in the cabinet and there was weed and now I'm not sad anymore
Taking one of the loudest shits ever at work and I have to say...I'm having a better time than I thought I would
Do you realize our room single-handedly hooked up with most of that wedding party last night?
Randomize
