I just spent the night with a bunch of indian guys and i wasn't attracted to a single one. Yeah i've officially become an anti-indian indian.
insurance, jail, and birth control were made for people like us.
He looked at me like he has never had a girl throw up on him before.
I can't believe all the places I got into shoeless last night. Apparently no one will say no to a girl covered in paint with a ripped shirt
She was telling me which girls she thought I should fuck or not at the bar. Why can't all one night stands be that cool after?
I think I reached optimum potential when I summersaulted straight into a kiddie pool.
No, earlier you attempted Jenga with everyones shoes.
I just don't know what he sees in my vagina...and that scares me.
Is it possible to have pulled a muscle in my neck from passing out with my head in a bucket?
The bouncer was being really rude for no reason. Steph PICKED him up and physically MOVED him from our path on the way out.
Well thats the pro of going out drinking with a pro body builder. Even if its a girl.
We weren't even through customs yet, and we got offered weed. You would love Jamaica.
I creeped him on fb. I'm about 90% sure I just blew him in the same tux he wore for his wedding..
Is this the guy that did shots off my ass at the beach? Haha
The fact that me being able to walk down stairs is an accomplishment in my books pretty much explains how I am
Halfway through the night I was hiding in a trashcan. Then I "sobered" up and ran around the house throwing change because I wanted to make my last moments of 2013 charitable.
I mostly blame me being such a miserable fuck on the fact that I was born on a Monday.
Randomize
