Is it 'vaginas' or 'vaginae?'. Either way there were a shit ton of them.
she took her clothes off and my dick went from =====> to =>
kyle and i were puking, simultaneously, off the front porch at 4 am, and in the middle of it he looks up, reaches his hand over, and says "knucks." And then I proceeded to fist bump him. By farrr the best time I've ever had puking.
I was just making a list of the girls i have slept with and i can't remember your sisters name
Excuse me? I'm weird? You're the one sticking your penis into a pringles can.
Never again let me pretend to be australian for free booze.
As of tonight I have officially had sex during every Disney movie.
im pretty sure thats the first step to being a pedafile
I can't figure out how to get this beer bong in my carry on without airport security questioning me as it goes through the x-ray.
You actually went to class. Im eating dry cereal naked and watching bring it on.
I bought everclear. Bring your party pants and some addies
You're not gonna punch me in the face again are you?
the guy sitting next to me at the bar has a patrick swayze tattoo hovering over a roast beef sandwich. 'merica.
I have to pee in a cup in the morning and they are going to say....you just peed a miller light. I'm going to hang my head in shame and say yes...yes I did.
Nothing like sunday church bells to aid your walk to the pharmacy to get plan b
Is talking to an iron man poster a good or bad indicator that you've been drinking too much?
Awesome. I did a rain go away dance. And it went away. Nbd just cotrollin the weather with my mind and sweet dance moves
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