I have to tell you about my conversation with the cloud dragon!
her facebook's as public as her vagina
i've been thru my totinos phase. then after reading the ingredients and nutritional info i almost puked in my mouth. its like having the bastard child of pizza hut and mcdonalds invade your kitchen and start stabbing your digestive system.
I just threw up in my hands while sitting on the toilet
Found a beard hair in my crotch.... care to explain?
Tonight will be judged a success if I walk out without having thrown up on my shirt.
when you agree to fuck a guy it does by NO means make it okay for his roommate to hide in the closet with doritos and watch
Well, I'm at the grocery store wondering whether I exist or not.
You told me to ditch them in the park, and when she jumped onto the car to stop us, you told me to scrape her off against a parked Jeep. That drunk.
I am "lost the control of my head" high right now.
I got kicked out of the hotel after wandering into the banquet kitchen at 2am trying to find the shrimp....so we're power napping in the car and then driving to madison.
Fuck you, if it wasn't for us going to the city, she would be using me as a human sex toy all day.
Last night was good. Things got bad when I found a sledge hammer.
It's amazing where one well timed dick pic can get you in life.
Can someone explain to me why guys are so fascinated w their dicks that they feel like they'll die if they don't send unsolicited dick pics
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