THE most awkward situation I have EVER been in
Also, I just threw up a little in my mouth and had to act like everything was totally fine.
If there is a god, you will have pink eye tomorrow.
My econ prof just gave me a shot glass because I was the "randomly picked" winner of the lecture. Ties into our supply and demand lecture, supplied with a shot glass, demand a thirsty thursday
She sat on the stairs and yelled sex positions at us. I don't remember if we went along with it but judging by the beer and condoms I'm thinking yes.
there are teeth marks in the soap. why are there teeth marks in the soap.
At one point, you closed your eyes and asked me which 'six flags' we were at
if you ever get a chance to, fuck in a lecture hall. great acoustics. highly recommend it.
We just had a sexually tense moment where we both chose the trough the pee. I love gay clubs.
I'm trying to convey to the smoking hot Spanish cleaning lady at work that I want to bone her but I think it's getting lost in translation. How do you say "blowjob" in Spanish?
She just shoved like three McNuggets in her mouth and started sobbing and I have no idea what's going on.
I got blood in my smoothie but it still tastes ok. Fuck glenfiddich.
I gave them the 'I used to fuck your son' discount.
and idk now I have nine bags of lettuce in my fridge
I woke up and couldn't find her. She had somehow managed to get into the closet and lock herself in. She was crying for her boyfriend. Thirsty Thursday at its finest
the voting booth dude cock blocked me or she woulda totally blown me in the voting booth.
Randomize
