I shampoo & condition my pubes, sometimes i wish my face was closer so i could rub against it cause it feels like plush
Spent $1500 on bottle service and have a lump on my head from hitting the nightstand while puking. Excess? Nooo Success.
i want you to feel like i'm letting you into my heart, not just my vagina.
suntimes in life you find a rare opportunity, mine was bonin my gf in front of the tv
can't wait for January to be Over so I don't have to see all the fat resolutionists working out.
believe me... letting the man that delivered you from your mother's vagina do shots off your stomach is really fucking awkward.
Her brother walked in on her giving me a bj and just laughed. I got a highfive before I left.
I was on my way at Dorito Smoothie
If he tries to stick his thumb up my butt again im going to rip his dick off with my vagina
I told you those kegels would come in handy one day
Beer, water, beer, water, beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer so much beer
Any residual attraction has just been ruthlessly murdered by that mustache.
especially when i'm drunk. his dick might as well be made of cotton candy.
He's ready to settle down, whereas I'm like "More shots please"
Three times. Three times I left home yesterday in search for sex, and three times I returned un-orgasmed.
Come over here. Bongs and porn. I found the promised land
Randomize
