some dude just recognized me causeg he had a pic of us making out onvhis phone
i just sat at a stop sign for 10 minutes waiting for it to turn green. i need to STOP SMOKING THIS SHIT.
i think i'm in class. and blacked out.
was it more than 30 minutes?
ya
then you're in a relationship
I GOT EATEN OUT IN A MERCEDES ON A TUESDAY NIGHT. I EARNED THIS SHIT.
He kept screaming "it's so seductive" while he was humping the wall
He blow dried my hair while I sucked his dick. Now THAT'S fucking teamwork.
I found his Linkedin the day after he created it. Too stalkerish or just right?
I have woke up on a strange couch, in a strange house, on another campus. Can you Friend-Find me and pick me up?
I think I fucked up my elbow when I tried to fight off the paramedics.
This is not the first time I've recognized my body is subconsciously trying to make pizza.
Everything isn’t always sunshine & rainbows. Sometimes there’s tequila.
I have no regard for my liver, you should know this.
We were totally high while having sex, I told him fast or slow, just follow your balls. That was a show stopper.
Yea and there’s destruction when we’re together, mostly of our livers but W/e
Randomize
