The way white people respond to them, you'd think Journey was the president of Caucasia.
Her boobs looked like leather oven mitts. No more cougar hunting for awhile.
Just dropped $150 at the liquor store. No power and two feet of snow has taken my alcoholism to another level.
He would stand there for a few seconds with a blank look on his face then randomly start running full sprint towards macdonalds. We'd catch him and he'd promise to stop so we'd let him go and he'd do it again.
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You tried to call "time out" during the sobriety test.
Curled up in the fetal position, trying not to throw up or think about my future, and humming songs from musicals to myself. You?
He was the one that got away. From my vagina.
Maybe you can hide out somewhere she would never go. Like a counseling center or AA
High me just had to pick the lock on my sisters room because I locked my vodka in there. I love vacation.
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you're usually drunk when you offer. there's one time you called me, told me not to dye my hair red, and asked if i wanted to see your tits.
He has silky zebra print sheets, which you would think he put on just for me, but the bed was unmade. Did I just sleep with a closet case??
Self reach around competition is what the Olympics has been missing all along. A true test of athleticism.
Compositionally, that's actually a really nice picture.
And your penis looks really nice too.
Yeah, but i got vodka and bacon out of it, so it's fine.
You smoked too much and passed out, didn't you?
You know me so well.
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