just saw a prosititute with a baby stroller...question is...if the baby wakes up is the blow job free?
Sometimes I worry for your future but then I remember how big your boobs are.
so went to the condom shack today. bought a condom that dresses up your dick in a suit...tomorrow im fucking in style
now I know why they wanted me to come. apparently gay guys are stripper magnets
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
This honesty session brought to you by jagermeister inc.
You were telling the cab driver that you believe in him and just to follow his dreams
Definitely just found that pen in the microwave. What the fuck.
If the world ends now I want you to know I was on my favorite toilet fighting the good fight.
Ive fucked up. im like a feral dog rabidly chasing an infrequent dream amidst a cataclysm of disaster
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's funny because every time I go up and down the stairs it's an adventure. A A DRUNK ADVENTURE. PS I ALREADY THREW UP WTF
Riddle me this: I can stream porn just fine but try and watch my college class and nooo it won't work
Be there in 4 minutes
Per my usual Thursday, I blacked out and slept on the stairs.
It was horribly awesome. Its like looking at the sun, you know its bad for you but I just couldn't stop looking.
Sitting in my junior high parking lot high on ambien talking to a stranger I met on tinder. What is life?
They don't really make a "hey I'm fucking your ex wife" card do they ?
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