Why are handjobs necessary in class?
I just took the soap out of the bathroom and hid it... this way I could see if she would say anything. you know, to see how clean she was
So I've officially decided that I AM that drunken mistake that girls hate themselves for in the morning.
The beer is more important than you right now.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
In Berlin they just cured HIV with stem cells. I am hereby fucking anything that moves.
it's official, after last weekend my girl number is higher than my guy number. fix this.
I can't believe you just became a stipulation in their divorce papers.
That is correct. I did in fact somehow pass out in the tanning booth for over an hour. And yes the attendant did have to open it up and shake me awake.
Yeah I don't even know dude. This shit has reached new levels of ridiculous. Let's hope baby Jesus gallops down a rainbow on a sparkling unicorn and wills that bitch clean. I think that's the best chance we've got.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Alls I wanted was a fun New Years but I end up fingering a geico sales representative on a futon and giving her a ride to work the next morning
I got the job! The hiring manager is the sister of a guy I slept with so its like I'm a real adult now
I touched the butt once. 'Twas an experience with the greatness of legend. So I touched it once more.
I just set up a proportion to calculate how much Jolly Rancher vodka I can make with the limited amount of Jolly Ranchers I have. Finally, real-life application of math.
I have jizz, in my hair. I'm sitting in class with jizz. In. My. Hair. I need to make better life choices.
how does that bad decision feel?
Randomize