I want leopard sheets
haha sexcapades
thats the plan
whoever created level 16 on brickbreaker is a dick
Puked on a Tom Jones impersonator on the strip
she gave him a mild concussion from throwing him against the wall in an attempt to dance with him. gotta love monday nights at the sandbar.
she pinky promised me she was 18
Well he told me I'd never be a wizard, and so I responded with you'll never have a big penis. After that we both just sat there and cried.
you woke me up at 7 am banging on my wall.. what the hell
thats the international knock for joint time
I just hope when I turn 21, it doesn't tank my entire semester.
Everyone heard you having sex but I just told them you were having a nightmare.
I told you you to bring something to share....you brought tequila and a condom
I owe you an apology, I was appointed captain of this sexy fuckship and I fell asleep at the helm.
THANKS BE TO BLACK BABY JESUS IN HIS LITTLE GOLDEN DIAPER FOR BLESSING ME WITH NOT PREGNANT
just realized I'll be in a check out line with just Hershey syrup and condoms. I don't know if I am setting a good image for our generation
I saw some guy masturbating in the Burger King parking lot and I’m just fucking done
The highlight of my week is I found some hetero porn I didn't completely hate. Branching out.
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