Do you think "I had sex with my co-worker last night I don't think I can come in today" is a good excuse?
just got cropdusted by the delivery guy...this was not in my job description.
I've blown a few things in my day
Isn't the perk of being in a relationship not having to put in effort for sex?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I don't know what you're doing, but there's a dragon on my street.
its not fair. if i was a guy, i'd be getting a high five for banging two in one night.
I woke up exactly where I passed out... on top of him yet he somehow put his pants back on
He shaved off his eyebrows. This is not my life.
I wanted to make fun of someone saying that to an untrained ear, skrillex is blah blah blah. But it was too soon after they said it. And now I can't find it. These are real problems.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm home alone drinking wine, so high, scrubbing my house down... This is what my thirsty thursday has become
I think if you have sex on the couch it will psychologically damage it.
Just screamed wow while using my vibrator.. new low
I'm pretty sure i doubled the number of dicks I've ever touched, last night.
I am pants-free in the living room. This is liberating.
Any luck with the purse?
No, though I did find her weed. Also her sons name is King. I'm uncertain how I feel about that
Randomize