forget your mom, you can see her anytime. A one night stand only happens ONE night.
I have to tell you about my conversation with the cloud dragon!
Can we talk about the cons of throwing up in the bathtub. there are no pros.
The guy drove to our house at 6am to sell us weed. Now that's customer service.
The Shake Weight not only toned my arms but significantly improved my hand job form and efficiency.
I still can't figure out why that's not in the commercial.
We were naked in his bed when he asked me "what should we do?"
It's official. 2011 is the year of sport fucking
no you went to jail because you don't know how to whisper when offering a cop a blow job. I'm sure him having a chick partner didn't help.
I think that was him coming out to me. I just brushed it off
I drank half a bottle of wine while watching the Olympics opening ceremonies. I catcalled at handsome athletes. Stop me.
We woke up at 7:30am. We got a 30 rack, yelled at all the freshman shackers walkin back to their dorms, played a game of beer die, and boned all before 11:00am. I found my soulmate
So his 25th anniversary post of love to his wife was almost verbatim what he said to me last week. Does that mean I win or lose?
Now when you said you'd never sleep with me, did you really mean never on a Monday or never without handcuffs or a blindfold or never on a airplane or never without lots of booze? Cus never is a pretty strong word.
Wow just discovered I can communicate my favorite sex positions using only emojis god bless this age of technology
Well, we 69'd in the Jacuzzi. If that tells you the kind of night I had. Neither of us knew we could hold our breath that long. Deff. Most. Dangerous. Sex. Ever.
Randomize
