I dont abuse you, i just hit you while we have sex
Okay, I have a threesome with foreigners and suddenly I'm a man-whore
there should be a rule against ugly people hooking up.
yeah...but then what would the ugly people do? hook up with pretty people? yeahhh..don't see that happening in the near future. plus i'm not okay with that.
did you seriously just ask me if there is such thing as a sophisticated batman shirt?
So I called her out for all the gossip she does and she's like "you do the same, bitch"
So I was like "Im classy like the Countess, youre just a bitch like Kim."
Kudos on the Interstate Housewife metaphor.
Listen, what he fails to understand is that the Olive Garden does not equal pussy.
If it carries over into the weekend I would be glad to nurse your vagina back to health.
I am currently watching him baptize himself in a baby pool with a handle of belvedere while wearing a coral dress.
I want to have sex with him.
Ran out of plates, so I'm using my sociology notes. Looks like they will finally have a practical use.
This feeling I'm having... is it love or a combination of alcoholism and unprotected rough sex
I'm starting to think that birthday sex is just an urban legend. Like the boogey man, and woman orgasms.
You thanked me for a delicious cock and tacos...
Im quite confident that my struggle with sobriety ended last night sometime after dinner
He walked in on me masturbating and on my phone but got mad because I wasn't watching porn just tweeting
Does fucking him in the back of the car with the sun roof retracted count as star gazing?
Randomize
