Look at my ENTIRE past
Highly public sexual behavior gross mismanagement of funds socially unaccpetable and radical speech and thought
Might as well have a blog about it at this point
Firetruck pulls up, fireman jumps out n knocks on my door, asks "do you know where Johnny lives?"
i kno its fucked up..but id rather sleep it off than seek medical attention right now
I think I just met the technical qualifications for binge drinking in five minutes
There's been so much talk around your vagina it's like a local celebrity
I have been running off of weed, alcohol, and Mexican food. What is Tallahassee.
I just feel like Im gonna be remembered as that one RA guy that used to sell weed
Honestly, it's not that easy picking a Saturday night outfit that can translate to Palm Sunday mass. Priorities.
Lets just fuck. We'll decide if it was makeup or breakup sex after.
Thanks for walking over, a conversation about David Bowie's dick as a muppet is exactly what my day was missing.
There was a reason God said "Let there be titties" on the Fifth Day.
I let my daddy issue flag fly free last night.
Tequila pump. I'm ecstatic your engineering degree has real world application.
I'm pretty sure the guy in front of me at Walmart doesn't have good plans. It's one am he is buying a flash light and black bandanna
I was sleeping and woke up in the bathroom already puking like i slept walk. Perrrrrrfect.
Randomize
