so i know my style isnt the best ever but u should have told me i was wearing two different shoes
Iiiiiii almost fall ib the lake
just peed on my foot to get a spider off. that lazy.
I have three paper towels stuck up my vagina. This is not a time to be calm.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Also I'd like you to set a calendar reminder that goes off every day for you to take 2 minutes to think about what your life would be like without me.
It was fun until the stripper told me it was her first day and started crying.
Februarys looking very promising in the vaginal department
I had an epiphany. If a dude dressed up as Batman to ask me out, I'd prolly marry him.
I woke wondering who the hell was in my bed. Then i felt boobs and remembered Haha. Thirsty Thursday killed my liver and my homosexuality
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Whether ya want it or not, it's gonna happen. Assimilate to the gay
Leave it to me to sleep w a guy who gets poison ivy on his dick
i was making a gravity bong in my room and my dad walked in. he helped me finish. i love being home for the holidays.
He paid for a 5 star hotel suite and I raided the mini bar after he left. I think that’s bad karma. Want some pringles?
he was really really nice, and I did coke off of his dong that night too
i'm trying not to stalk him on facebook
i gave in
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