Oh just a soda. I'm "driving"
I want to take things slow emotionally, but fast physically
i've never been more proud of someone than i was when he told me he got his first blowjob at age 13...from two chicks
just saw a girl who had one of those monogrammed backpacks... her initials are VAG. is this a sign?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Nothing like a Mormon bachlorette party to make you feel slutty
We got back together. The pastures weren't greener on the other side, the dicks were just smaller
He smashed a plastic chair leg on a tree stump, threw himself into the side of our metal enclosure, stomped on the wreckage for a bit and then punched the fire.
do we own a ladder
We do not.
then how am i on the roof
Some lady just walked up to me in the bar and proclaimed that I looked like a "shady motherfucker." Can't argue with that one.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Pizza and koolaid didn't even make me feel better. This hangover means business
I don't get it. Why have babies when you can have vodka?
I was totally going to fuck him and then his friend walked in brushing his teeth, whipped down his pants and started doing the windmill. Ultimate cock block
Dude why is my bed and bedding wrapped in bubble wrap?
Cuz u wanted to insure u had a safe sleep
I'm pretty sure he sprained my clit...
Who the fuck puts glitter on their vagina? It’s all over my face and crotch.
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