no, i'm proud of you. this is the happiest you've been since you discovered that bowls can be used as cups if you don't feel like washing dishes.
Signed everyone in my dorm up for free samples of astroglyde. Took me an hour. Happy new years!!!!!
One person in the car. Three blizzards. Alot of judging.
I just figured you know how to drive a boat and I know how to get drunk. What can go wrong
If i pass out for a while at graduation, please atleast TRY to wake me?
I feel like everytime I call him he's either fucking or getting into trouble. It's really disturbing that he presses the answer button and then proceeds to fuck her harder.
You know it is an interesting night when the 911 operator calls you
he says he is going to get you very high and make you leave the country with him
possibly by boat
Why did you load my phone up with pics of Al Gore?
Then James put his arms through the window and grabbed him, like he was Robocop. A nerdy, portly Robocop.
Who is this?
I'm so happy we share a mutual love of laughing at religion.
Need ride home. Girls. Stolen keg. Rolling down streets. Horny girls. No condoms. Rescue needed. girls and beer in exchange for rescue and bacon?
I. Hate. You. Where are you, are said girls cute, and how did you know I bought bacon? And how does this always happen to you?
Smarter than the average bear
Ate a slug for 39 dollars
I wouldn't expect anything less from a PhD student
Your boobs are like a folk legend.
Last time he showed up for Christmas he went on and on about backpacking somewhere and getting ghonnorreah twice.
Randomize
