she says her boyfriend and her dignity are both out of town tonight
New low. Found an ant nibbling on my last xanax. Flicked it away and popped it in my mouth anyways.
its like he missed a chap in the "being a guy" handbook and read the bible instead
How did people poop without Blackberrys?
Motorola Razers?
Stone age, man.
I can't really talk right now. I'm getting on a plane to Oregon to go give a guy a bj. I'll see you in three days.
Your excessive judging is making this uncomfortable
Today's hangover is a "wear sunglasses while pooping in the dark" kind of day
So a sorority girl just introduced herself to me by saying "a guy I used to fuck just threw up on me" and then she grinded on me
I gave him head in my cape. On the kitchen floor. Watching a show about bacon.
Repeat. Dildo on the ceiling, confiscated potato shooter, and bottle of yegger. Repeat. Ceiling dildo and yegger.
All of her cloths were on our coffee table this morning. The only things she left with last night were her shoes and Scott
I'll remember. Also, I owe you 200 for a pair of shoes that I carelessly bought to improve my spinal structure, to improve my health and ensure that I love to be 300 years old. Like Adam. Of the bible.
Happy cinco de mayo!! Puke filled sombrero in the lawn needs to be picked up and whos never punched my fence boards in half needs to replace those by the way the owner of those panties (see attached photo) anytime you wanna cum over;-) hiii!
I'm sorry about the spring break comment. I won't make anymore pornos, I promise.
you've already made the comitment to pee in public you should at least whip your dick out
Randomize