there were no ball for pong so he bought cat toys..... they had bells in them
She told me I had to leave by four. We fucked until six thirty and we are the champions played on the way home. Yeah god knew
Check that he is NOT ok. He just heated up SoCo and used it as syrup on his pancakes.
Just saw a porn entitled "Nad Biter". Redheads are now forever out of the picture.
Today might be the day that I legitimately throw up in my saxophone.
She literally just puked and rallied AT HER OWN WEDDING. Welcome to White Trash town, America.
Called my dealer in tears and we talked for an hour until I felt better. That's the way it should be.
He asked me if the reason I slept around is because I grew up in a broken home. I am so done fucking Christians.
probably one of the worst weekends ever... i got peed on by his sleepwalking roommate.
Lets trade lives
And i will lay in bed and piss all over everywhere, drink whiskey and have sex with married bears
420 is off to a bad start. Mark wake/baked WAY too much, and he has spent over $50 on the claw machine in the grocery store.
The bartender had to walk me home last night. New high or new low?
You realize that if you get murdered while we're talking, I'm gonna have to explain to your next of kin why the last thing on your phone is a picture of my boobs.
when I walked in the door they were passed out naked, on top of eachother, with tetris controllers in their hands.
Sorry I didn’t really get to say goodbye last night I was busy vomiting in your fathers front yard
Randomize
