I'm fascinated by her cleavage. She has deep cleavage, but no obvious boobage to speak of. Check it out.
I want my own midget army. I think I would be a good midget army leader.
New all-time record for most uncomfortable I've ever been. A midget just asked me to restrap his fanny pack in the bathroom.
I want to make a porn site called "girls with daddy issues"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i now officially have to be stoned in order to look like my passport when i go to a different country
Woke up to a break up text for a facebook relationship I didn't even know I was in... 2012 is going to be a good year
she came back from her house with A paper cut , a 2liter of sprite with Bacardi , and half a mustache . we're inviting her more ofte
You don't have a wife, you don't have a dog, and you need a new bong. Don't make this any worse than that.
I'd like to thank you for ensuring I didn't die. Id also like to show you the most impressive bruise you will perhaps ever see
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
how do you casually eat pancakes with someone after they send you an unsolicited dick pic?
you don't. it's the point of no return for pancake enjoyment.
I'm sorry I didn't get you anything for your birthday
It's just you didn't get me the fucking bear suit last year
Dad is celebrating turning 45 by being drunk in a department store before two o'clock.
He has no idea I'm scrolling through Instagram while he's going down on me. I'm so bored.
Ugh. I need to go to the store, but I'm too lazy. Whatever shall I do? That girls still passed out. I should steal her car
I am in no place to make rational decisions, but right now i want you inside me
Randomize