You are possibly the most enthusiastic, likable bad influence I've ever met.
Maybe if i eat something filling like whole wheat pasta it will make me less hungry for things like dick
Jack off faster Americas best dance crew is beyonce themed
at least after i hook up with someone i have the decency to ignore them
I need a creepy friend to scare off the other creepy people
I would be honored to be that friend.
Even tho I saw his penis. He is still a really nice guy.
Just don't eat pie out of the sink. It's a real blow to the self esteem.
You kept whispering "Party Dave" every time someone would start talking.
Apparently from about 3-5AM I was consoling that crying stripper about her life choices.
They think its so cute and admirable that I learned French. BITCH HAVE YOU NEVER HEARD OF GOOGLE TRANSLATE? sexting foreign bitches, there's an app for that
i found waldo and immediately set him to work eating me out. please have more out of season costume parties.
Should I be flattered that she mumbled "You're the king of my face" before passing out?
There's a set of buzz lightyear wings in lost and found at work. I just need access to your roof.
Worst wingman u don't do ANYTHING but laugh at my incompitant shyness
Everything is scary i hate being an adult i hate responsibility tell me a dick joke
Randomize
