I think I have swimmer's ear. From his tongue.
Home remedy for the herp. Black tea. I need to strap teabags to my wang.
LOVE ME LIKE A KANGARO LOVES A POUCH YOU DUMB CUNT
I'm not trying to alarm you guys, but I think I just swallowed a ketchup packet.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
now that I know that you did coke with your mom I can't look at her the same
Everyone loves nachos, first of all. Second, Ke$ha is entirely appropriate for the age grou too young to realize she probably has Hep C.
We are no longer allowed to have pre 4th party week. I woke up with a donut stuck to my face and 'MILF' written in black marker on my stomach.
Mother of the Year
The more I piece together last night the more I want to vomit it out of my brain.
We dated for a month and a half. he didn't like blow jobs. I honestly don't think he was human.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Evidently I placed three booty calls at the same time...it was an ugly scene. I'm never getting that high again.
Don't judge me 👊🏼 his dick just whispers my name
yes, i'm a douce. but i'm a high quality douche.
He wore pink swim trunks on our date and repeatedly insulted my profession, but his cat kept standing up like a person to nuzzle my face and I felt like a Disney Princess. I hate this dude, but the cat is too amazing for me to not fake interest for.
I was playing 'If You Had To Fuck One or Die' with the old composite pictures with a guy in the bathroom line. They were all pretty ugly so I go "You can tell this is a lower tier frat"......turns out the guy was a brother
How was it?
Incredible. Everyone in the world should be having the kind of sex I've been having.
He should write a pamphlet or something...
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