Don't you send me to vm
Nakedness is not a toga. Just sayin
I just woke up under a kitchen table with my sandals taped to my feet and a corona bottle taped to my hand..
we are going to smoke at least three blunts before we go see Cloudy with a chance of meatballs. I'm going to have my mom make us spaghetti for when we get out so can your mom make those spicy meatballs? I thought I'd give you 9 days notice so everything's perfect.
I even made an effort to dress like a conservative young lady who doesnt black out and throw up in her bed regularly today.
I just remember telling jokes while vomitting
All I remember is him trying to go down on me, but I guess I was too busy making out with his brother
He paid me to blow him while doing a handstand. Does that make me a whore or just a budding gymnast?
Would you wanna look up as you cum and for a split-second see your dad?
I want to throw pennies on her stage, or just ripping up a dollor bill and throw them one at a time.
I just started talking about my sextoy because I wanted things to be normal again.
I'm staying at his house to solve the homeless situation. There's a freezer bag of weed in the fridge. He doesn't know it's there, and he's not missing it so I may have an income soon.
I just realized I slept with a guy who used the pickup line "do you have a bandaid? I skinned my knee when I fell for you."
honestly my period and I are just as surprised to see each other every month
My professor congratulated me on turning my assignment in early. I didn't have the heart to tell him I only passed it in early cause my sex plans got canceled for the night.
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