Once again you get dinner and all I get is semen on my leg
After doing lines off my chest, she said, "do you even know how fast I could suck your cock right now?!!" and her friend said, "yea she totally could".
To say he's a good fuck is like saying the beatles had a bit of success. My vag is still mourning the fact he moved.
Honestly, it's not that easy picking a Saturday night outfit that can translate to Palm Sunday mass. Priorities.
So the crazy cock blocking bitch sent her a picture of her boobs using MY phone and said: he's busy at the moment
If if makes you feel any better, you're definitely the hottest guy I've ever friendzoned.
This guy is selling weed on the train. Like... Straight up. No fucks given.
I was stuffing my vagina with gummy bears last night having him eat them out of me. Team Haribo for the win!
Sex in your truck helped me start regaining feeling in my jaw. Thanks!
I put his pb&j sandwich in my bra and never looked back
I'm dying of laughter, but I'm also just dying
Send help
If they start to date again I refuse to help her sext him. Helping my mom sext my dad is where I draw the line.
I hate her so much I want to fuck her boyfriend.
We're both fucking guys named Frank. Our friendship was meant to be.
I'm not just straddling the line between love and hate, I'm dry humping the shit out of it
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