If everyone lived like me, we would need 5.9 earths. Fuck yes america.
I just made a friends list on fb of all the guys ive hooked up with. genius.
If I had a nickel for every time my parents threatened to stop paying tuition I would be a very rich man. Rich enough to pay my own tuition.
Only you could manage to look like a complete slut while wearing a turtle neck.
i've already watched her fall off the steps, walk up on our porch and try to dance with the dog, and stumble across the street to stand outside the neighbors window...is it taking it too far to watch this rando girl and some guy have sex behind our parking lot now?
Preparing for thanksgiving at home now by chugging bourbon. Less than a month to train!
she puked as i came inside her. that has to mean something.
I think you begin to realize how unfair life really is when you're high and you discover that the new box of fruit by the foot on your shelf is actually empty
I feel like, for the first time today, we had a healthy yolo.
The drug dealer had chickens in his house so I know it was good stuff.
Just streaked campus for a bottle of patron...maybe you're right...I might have a drinking problem...
so hungover. I'm actually considering eating the snow off the roof so I don't have to leave my bed
i love how you just walk into that dealer's house every time without knocking, yet you don't even know his name
At least your road beer policy is responsible. Well, relatively speaking.
Drinks have officially taken priority over self-respect, and I'm not even all that torn up about it.
Randomize
